Just before the time when I needed to choose my educational path as a freshman in college, I was baptized and became a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. As I embraced my newfound values, I found inspiration in the church’s teachings on families and how the answers to the problems facing society seemingly could be found in the gospel. Encouraged by the scriptures and the value the church puts on education “by study and also by faith,” I sought the answers from science and scholarly study and found that much of what social scientists have found contribute to happy and healthy families are also foundational teachings in the gospel.
BYU and The School of Family Life was the perfect place for me to understand this connection. There I was trained to become an activist for family friendly public policy and was encouraged to continue my scholarship and work.
When I had joined the church, my mother worried if her strong-willed and passionate daughter was up to the challenge of living the traditional role of a Mormon woman. I was pleasantly surprised to see that this stereotype did not always bear out in my observations of women in the church. At BYU, I found many examples of LDS women who were balancing the dual callings of mother and professional. I had hope and faith that the Spirit would guide me to the roles that I would play in my family and community though I did not understand how it would work.
As I came close to completion of a graduate degree, it was revealed to me in a blessing that the path I thought my life would take was different that what my heavenly parents intended. Just as I was expecting to hear counsel to be solely devoted to my family and raising my children, I was encouraged to continue my studies and activism. That was the last thing I expected to hear!
That blessing made me realize that I was going to be atypical in the church. After a shocking birth experience where my right to informed consent was threatened and ultimately withheld, losing my job while on maternity leave and being thrown headlong into the Mommy Wars, I learned first-hand some of the discrimination and hurdles that complicate motherhood. I started to view family policy from the perspective of a mother and became aware that women’s efforts to provide for themselves and their families are still very much devalued in our society.
I was inspired to continue my work as an activist and found ways to work from home as a stay at home mother. In addition to completing a master’s degree with a child on my hip and another in utero, I collaborated with the non-profit, Solace for Mothers, to create an online discussion board for women who were struggling with emotional trauma caused by their childbirth experiences, and volunteered with the organization The Coalition for Improving Maternity Services to promote The Birth Survey, a consumer feedback website reviewing maternity care providers.
Currently enrolled in midwifery school and with plans to pursue a doctorate degree in the future, I find strength in the teachings of the gospel, the stories of women of the restoration and reliance on personal revelation.
Good for you! I’m always interested in how we can implement family friendly laws and policies. I especially want the idea of men taking leave for childrearing to be the norm. Though many states require that men and women have equal access to “maternity” leave, most men are not taking advantage of it. And when they do they’re often “punished” financially. I want maternity and child-rearing to be a societal issue rather than just a women’s issue. I’m interested in equal parenting, and wonder how I can implement it in my own life.
This is so great Jenne! I’m excited for all the work you’ll be doing here as well. And I’m thrilled to have a place where we can put our thoughts into action somehow.
Jenne,
I can so relate to you on wanting to help create more positive birth experiences for women. I’m sure you have read “Push”, if not, it is an excellent read and resource.
Thank you for sharing your story. I will check out Solace for Mothers, I didn’t even know such a thing existed!
I totally agree. I had the most wonderful amazing natural birth. It was so empowering and I wish that everyone’s birth experiences were numinous. I just participated in a study with Mary Reagan at University of Maryland’s nursing program where they interviewed first time mothers about their birth choices. It was fascinating to see why we think what we think, how decisions are made and what information is promulgated. Check out her study or contact her if you are interested to know more.
Thank you for the positive responses!
Motion de Smiths, the Women’s Service Mission is looking for contributors to write about advocacy opportunities that are meaningful to them personally. I hope you’ll consider writing something advocating for paternity leave becoming more accepted and encouraged for new fathers.
Corktree, I’ll be counting on you to submit your thoughts you want to see in action.
Juliane, yes I am familiar with pushed. I think its a great book for anyone who wants to become an advocate for maternity care. Let me know if you are interested in hosting a book group discussion on the Women’s Service Mission with that book.
CSS, thanks for telling me about the study. As a researcher myself, I feel sympathetic to other researchers and want to participate in their data collection as often as I am able. I remember trying to get people to participate in my study!