Guest Post: Caring, Sharing, and Improving

December 15, 2010 by 5 Comments

by Sandra Jergensen

Sandra is a friend of several of the WAVE members and lives in Baltimore with her family. She was invited to share this story to illustrate how she helped create awareness regarding young women’s issues in the church.

Two months or so ago when Kathryn Soper’s article, “Why Standards Night is Substandard: Teaching Sexuality to Young Women” was published on Patheos, I read it and was really impressed. The article touched on things I experienced growing up but had never heard addressed in any standards night or lesson I attended. I then linked the article and posted it to my facebook account to share it with friends and family. The ideas were too important to keep to myself and I wanted to open a dialogue about a topic that I feel is really important and easily overlooked.

A few weeks ago I got an email from my dad asking for the link again, he had remembered the article and wanted to pass it along. My father is on the high council in his stake and works directly with the young women’s presidency, and they were planning their stake standards night. At the meeting when they, along with the young men’s presidency and stake presidency were deciding what to tailor their messages to fit, one person asked what do the young women need? It was quickly piped in that the girls are fine, and just need to watch themselves so the boys aren’t distracted. And that is when my father spoke up, recalling the article, saying that the young women shouldn’t be passed over in that fashion, and could he have everyone read an article his daughter had linked.
All agreed to read and reconvene.  My dad told me that everyone, the entire high coucil, stake presidency and young men and young women’s presidencies, had nothing but positive feedback. They were receptive, impressed and surprised, seeing the way sexuality and young women from an entirely different standpoint; something that was irrelevant at the last meeting.  And that was going to change the plans for the evening, something address that there is more to teen sex than just taming desire of volatile male libidos.
I was blown away; by my dad’s interest in something that concerns me, by his shared belief when he took the time to read the article, and his desire to pass the knowledge of the too often omissions in the way we teach chastity standards in the church. I am happy for the youth that will get the updated, improved and more applicable message in their standards nights.
I wish I could say I was responsible for all of the good that will come of this, but I’m not. I only did a simple thing: I shared something that mattered to me. It was a little thing that has meant so much.
Filed Under: HOPE

Comments

  1. css says:
    December 15, 2010 at 7:40 am

    I LOVE this! It gives me so much hope that there really is a need and a desire for greater information about women in the church. There is so much yet to be done, but I think sometimes we create our own barriers. Why wouldn’t the leaders want to know how to better communicate with Young Women about chastity? Why wouldn’t they want to tailor the discussion based on women’s experiences rather than from a male-biased perspective? Maybe our own fear is keeping us from passing on this information! Thanks Sandra for your courage and example!

    Reply
  2. Sandra says:
    December 15, 2010 at 5:01 pm

    I failed to mention how much I appreciate and admire my dad for sharing the article and some new ideas. He’s so great and I’m so proud of him.

    Reply
  3. Jessawhy says:
    December 18, 2010 at 3:04 pm

    Jennifer,
    If you click on the orange letters, “Why standards night. . . ” you can go right to the article!

    Thanks for your comments. This is a great example of why we should always share these great ideas with our family and friends.

    Reply
  4. Deborah says:
    December 30, 2010 at 8:30 pm

    Sandra, since your dad is my cousin, I am particularly thrilled to read this — hope our paths cross sometime!

    Reply

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